I think one of the most significant parts of being human is that we are the same and we are unique. Our sameness makes larger ideas such as healthcare and government easy enough to generalize from a top view. For example: colds and bacterial illnesses can be understood and treated within predictive parameters. Rules can be generalized to protect the safety of our country members. On an individual level, however, humans are more complex. Each of us are born with gifts, talents, and personalities that are not cookie cutter. No two people are the same and it is silly to believe anyone would be. Consequently, developing your uniqueness is the key to finding satisfaction in life. If you feel unhappy in life, it is because you are not honoring your beautiful, majestic self. **I will caution here that everyone should be concerned with establishing adaptive behavior patterns. Maladaptive behavior patterns do not serve anyone in the end. There is an amazing book called, Growing Up Again that helps with developing adaptive behaviors from the ground up.
Being unique is a concept that is exciting and daunting. Realizing and owning your uniqueness means you will need to feel comfortable developing yourself on your own. Of course you can include understanding people who are supportive in your life. However, using your intuition, developing your unique skillsets, and healing old wounds may not be something everyone is able to comprehend. Also, many people can give advice but only you know what resonates with you. A good therapist/coach can listen non-judgmentally and with the right training, they will be able to provide researched direction and advanced listening and problem solving skills.
My calling in life is to bring to fruition the reality that everyone can thrive in this life. Additionally, I know that individuals were not called to be uniform. Another great point is it is not necessary to compare yourself to/with others. We all have very different experiences, drives, beliefs, and upbringings. The only hard and fast rule is: be kind and empathetic with yourself and others.
Here a few tips to help you discover and own your uniqueness:
- Try out anything that interests you. On the road to self discovery, you cannot learn if you don’t try new things. No one says you have to like everything you try and you don’t have to stick with activities you hate.
- Only do the things that fill your cup. If some things in your life are not working, ask God/your higher self/the universe for guidance. Be patient as you tweak your life into all it can be. Many situations that seem unworkable can rectify themselves. On the other hand, unworkable situations will drift away.
- Don’t listen to people who try to discourage you. Many people simply live in a predictable pattern day to day. Adventure can be scary to people who possess low self esteem and would rather control others. Work on raising your self esteem and you will not be able to hear the naysayers.
- Love where you are. Dreaming big can be difficult when you feel stuck where you are. Just know it is fine to be where you are and it is exciting to accomplish more.
- Work through your feelings. Although they may not seem like much, feelings control every aspect of your life. It is important to understand your feelings, process them, and reframe them when necessary.
- Be assertive. Standing up for yourself is one of the most important things to do. Being unique goes against social norms. Believe in yourself and refuse to let other people set your agenda.
All the best!